


stars and steel

by Lackystars



Category: Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: BIG MOOD, Basically, F/M, Fun Times!, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, i hope you enjoy kk!, okay they just cry about their feelings, stahl is such a soft boy tbh, suffering an identity crisis about your evil self??
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-04
Updated: 2018-08-04
Packaged: 2019-06-21 06:41:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15551916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lackystars/pseuds/Lackystars
Summary: On paper, it was an easy choice. One life pitted against thousands. Obviously, any rational person would choose to sacrifice themselves. That was what Celeste told herself. But sometimes, Stahl made her world not so black and white. Sometimes, the scent of overturned hay and fried fig cakes made her think twice about throwing her life away.





	stars and steel

The day they last met, it was raining. It began as a whisper from the heavens above, perhaps a sign of things to come. Earlier, in the bustling streets of Ylissetol, fat, fluffy, white clouds lazily rolled around. It was a nice day. But then, the picturesque blue sky had turned into a dark gravel grey, and there was a grumbling, almost as if it came from the Fell Dragon itself. Those same clouds had become heavy, and soon, the light sprinkling of rain had turned into a torrential downpour. The drops of water carried an almost oppressive weight to them. Splat. Thud. Pitter patter. It sounded like the obligatory applause you gave at the end of a mediocre performance. Dull and muted, but still there. Still meaningful.

Anyone caught without an umbrella or shelter would be in for an unpleasant surprise. And of course, on this particular day, fate decided that Celeste would suffer to the whims of the weather. Hurriedly, she made her way back to the barracks, cradling the new tomes she had bought in preparation for their final battle against her chest.

Echoes of Grima’s voice lingered in Celeste’s mind. Sometimes she would be aggressive, and demand that Celeste submit to her will. She would threaten to destroy everything and everyone she loved. But that was easily manageable- after all, the words Grima spoke were empty and held no meaning to them- and even if they did, Celeste was stronger than that. To give in to the Fell Dragon was to cast the future into a deep despair where there was no hope. Logic dictated that this was not the desired outcome.

But sometimes, logic didn’t always work.

Attrition was a powerful thing, and at first, it didn’t even feel like Grima was trying. She had become awfully quiet, and for once, Celeste felt like she could finally have respite from the Fell Dragon’s mad whispers. However, it was too good to be true. It always was. The dreams were normal enough. Scenes of her everyday life played out, ranging from Stahl mischievously taking one of her freshly baked cookies, to her practicing her magic. But then, the dreams started changing. It would start off the same way, yet through some inexplicable force, Celeste would find herself slowly being forced out of her body, viewing herself in the third person.

Her body was being taken over by Grima.

That wasn’t even the scary part. No, it was the fact that the line between her and the Fell Dragon was becoming increasingly blurred. The way Grima in her body would act, living out a life that she stole, the way that Stahl would smile and laugh at this _thing_ wearing her face as if there was nothing wrong… It almost felt natural. And that’s where it hurt. Maybe deep down, Celeste always knew the truth. That she was dispensable. Replaced.

But perhaps the biggest issue was the realisation that even though she tried so hard to run away from her past, it always caught up to her- there was no denying that she and Grima were one and the same. Or at, it was destined to be. The dreams were proof of this underlying fear. It sickened her to the core watching Stahl treat Grima with such love and affection, a painful reminder of who she truly was.

Celeste didn’t want to think about it. Or rather, she couldn’t allow herself to. Doing so would only serve to water the seeds of doubt that Grima had planted in her heart.

Arriving at the quarters she and her husband shared, she opened the door to a rather… _interesting_ sight. Lying on top of the bed was Stahl, half naked, rubbing a paste all over his chest. Feeling her cheeks grow warm, she tried to modestly avert her gaze, however, she couldn’t help but to linger on his body. It was truly a sight to behold. Scanning down to where firm lines met, framing his muscles that were toned from years of fighting on the battlefield… Celeste quickly shook her head. Now was not the time for such thoughts.

“Stahl… What are you doing? Celeste asked curiously, as she placed the tomes on top of the bedside table.

“Huh?” Stahl exclaimed, looking around as if he had only just realised Celeste had entered the room. Then his green eyes laid upon brown, and the corners of his lips slowly turned up. With a slight tilt of his head, he smiled gently. At this, Celeste sighed happily to herself. Her husband could be such a scatter brain at times, but gods be damned if she didn’t love him for it. “O-oh, welcome back Celeste! I missed you…” Stahl greeted warmly.

“I’m trying out this new ointment my dad taught me how to make. It’s supposed to be a warming formulation that helps soothe sore muscles! Although, it’s not very pain relieving… it just feels warm. And itchy.” Stahl explained.

Celeste raised her eyebrows in confusion. “Er… That doesn’t sound right. Stahl, maybe you’re actually having an allergic reaction?” Celeste said. She bit her lip, trying to stifle a laugh.

“Probably? Oh well,” Stahl shrugged. He then glanced at Celeste, eyes widening as he realised his wife was dripping wet. “You’re soaking wet! Caught out in the rain, huh?” Stahl said, a slight smirk on his face.

“Yeah… Before I even knew it, I was drenched from head to toe!” Celeste exclaimed.

Winking, Stahl slowly approached Celeste. “Let’s get you dried up.” he said. Gently, he placed his hands on her cloak, taking it off. Celeste felt herself growing warm at the sudden physical contact, turning in on herself.

“I-it’s okay… I can do it myself.” Celeste smiled. Removing the wet pieces of clothing, she crossed her arms, feeling the chilly air bite at her exposed skin. Noticing how cold she was, Stahl leaned over the tactician, bringing her into a tight embrace. She felt her cheeks light on fire, rosy pink appearing on her face. Wrapping her arms around his waist, his bare chest aligned with her own, and even though she had been freezing cold just a few moments ago, her body was ablaze.

As if to maintain some sort of dignity, she protested weakly. “Silly… You’re just going to get wet too.”

That didn’t mean she wasn’t enjoying his presence. Resting her head on his shoulder, she closed her eyes, listening to his heart beat. It was steady. And maybe it was the romanticist inside her, but it was a constant. Being near Stahl always reassured her with a sense of security- the scent of freshly fried fig cakes and lazy hay.

“Aww… where’s the fun in that? But okay, if you insist.” Stahl said, a glimmer of mischief twinkling in his eyes, the tips of his mouth perking into a mild grin. Reluctantly, he let Celeste go, letting her get dressed. There was something about seeing her wear his oversized clothes that was rather satisfying- maybe it was the way the sleeves hung off her arms, buried in his favourite turtleneck. “So,” Stahl began. “What were you up to?”

“Nothing much. Went into town, stocked up on some tomes.” Celeste answered nonchalantly, letting herself fall onto the bed. As soon as her body hit the mattress, it was as if all the tension in her limbs had decided to simultaneously manifest and relieve itself. She absently stretched, trying to get in a comfortable position.

“Ah, in preparation for our final battle?” Stahl commented, benign as ever, but Celeste couldn’t help but to grimace at his words.

“…Yeah.” she murmured quietly, pursing her lips. She didn’t want to think about their final battle. She didn’t want to think about all the potential lives that could be lost if her strategies failed. She didn’t want to think about making a choice, the choice that would force her to pit one life against tens of thousands. Even if it made sense to sacrifice her own life to end the Fell Dragon once and for all, _she_ was the one making that choice. It was _her_ life. And as selfish as it sounded, she didn’t know if she had it to carry the burden of such a responsibility. She didn’t _want_ to.

Stahl looked into Celeste’s deep brown eyes, finding an uncertainty that he had never seen before. With a sad smile, he gently placed his hands on top of her own. They were soft, but also weathered with experience, and he could feel the discomfort she was inadvertently channelling.

“Honey, are you okay? You look kinda… stressed.” Stahl breathed, wondering what was bothering his beloved so much.

“It’s nothing, really. I’m fine.” Celeste admitted, but Stahl couldn’t help but to roll his eyes at this. He crossed his arms, trying to look upset with her for lying to him, but his features soon softened into sympathetic concern.

“Celeste, remember when we first met? You said that I must have been a psychic or something for being able to know exactly what you wanted. I said it was because I knew how to read faces."

"Yes...? What are you getting at, Stahl?" Celeste queried, raising an eyebrow at the way he had brought it up. 

"You can't lie to me. You aren't fine. I know you're not." Stahl muttered. 

Celeste bit her lip, unable to meet his eyes. Never before had he sounded so aggressive, so  _bitter_. It was almost disturbing in a way. "Listen, Stahl, I'm okay. Seriously. There's nothing to worry about, I promise." she said, trying to appease her lover with a kind smile. 

However, Stahl wasn't having it. Cradling the back of her head and tilting it his way, he leaned in, his face only inches from her own.

"I," he began, his voice a ragged whisper. "I promised that I would protect you, no matter the cost." With his other hand, he grabbed Celeste's hand, forcing it to trace the scar along his sternum. "Do you feel that? It was when the Risen had sneaked up behind you. You were too busy commanding our troops that you didn't even realise that you were being ambushed." 

"I rushed in and took the hit for you. It hurt. But it wasn't just because of the Risen's sharp claws, it was more than that. What pained me was the fact that in taking care of other people, you failed to look after yourself. It was almost as if you didn't realise how important you were to all of us. To me. And it was right then and there, I decided to never take my eyes off of you."

Stahl pushed Celeste's bangs away, placing a tender kiss on her forehead. "You know that I would die for you, over and over again if need be. But I won't, because I don't want you to be sad. I don't want you to cry over me, even if I am the most plain and average guy out there."

With a anxious breath, he sheepishly glanced to the side. "I know now's not the time to discuss our faults, but there's one thing about you that I don't really like. You're selfish, Celeste. You won't let people worry over you. You try to carry the weight of all our burdens. You're always saying it's okay. But, you know, it's okay to not be okay. Like Lucina often says, our bonds gives us strength. It gives us hope. You can rely on all of us. You can rely on me." 

Closing his eyes, Stahl leaned in, his lips brushing against Celeste's. Although no words were being spoken, he let his tongue do the talking. 

_I love you._

Celeste was no stranger to Stahl's kisses. Sometimes, they were light and mellow, just like the green haired cavalier himself. Other times, they were demanding yet determined, setting her body ablaze. But this time, it was different. It was a muted desperation that she had never felt before, warming down to her very core. It was a request. 

_Don't leave me._

They broke apart, gasping for air. "Stahl..." was all that Celeste could muster. She didn't have the strength to say anything else, and she wasn't sure if she could bring herself to. What could she possibly say to him? He was right, she had been selfish in putting others before herself. Even if it was out of a love for her comrades, it was potentially a prelude to her swift end. She couldn't afford to die- as egocentric as it sounded, if she fell, then the Sherpards would fall. After all, it was the birth of Grima from the weakness of her own heart that had led to such a disastrous future. 

"I can't protect you from yourself! How can you expect me to just stand there and watch you  _die_? D-do you know what you're asking me to do?" Stahl cried out, his breath hitching. He squeezed Celeste's hand, trembling slightly.

It was rare to see him in such a state. Stahl always had a perpetually pleasant demeanour. The only time he indulged in letting emotions run rampant was during their nights of passion, or when he was surrounded by his favourite foods. This, the wilderness in his eyes and the sorrow in his voice, was none of those things.

"Please, Stahl. Calm down. I'm here now, right?" Celeste began, trying to console Stahl. Her platitudes felt empty, but it was the least she could do. Her heart ached to see the man she loved look so hopeless. She realised that she took for granted Stahl's steady strength, but like any steel sword, it eventually broke. 

"To be honest, I'm scared. I don't want to die. I want to live the rest of my days with you by my side, my knight in shining armour." Celeste spoke, a weak smile forming on her face. "I want you to hold me in my arms. I want you to help me back up, the countless times I have fallen off Flint. I want to see Morgan grow up happy and healthy." As she recalled her experiences with the cavalier, both the good and the bad, one thing always stayed the same- the colour green. Green was the colour of life, of renewal, and of nature. Everything that Stahl reminded her of.  

"Celeste, we can do all that and so much more..." Stahl murmured, clenching his fist in a strange mix of anger and resignation. "There has to be another way. I promised I would never leave you. I can't- I won't let you do this to me!" 

"Stahl... I am afraid that's simply not possible. You know what is at stake. I wouldn't wish the pain and suffering we have been through on anyone, and if Chrom delivers the final blow, then one day,  _she_ will come back. You're asking me to damn future generations. You're asking me to force this horrible decision onto someone else. And I'm sorry, but I cannot allow that." Celeste finished. Green was also the colour of greed. And maybe, like the glutton Stahl could be, his greed for Celeste was the only thing consuming his grief. 

There was a silence. Some silences were awkward, some were tense, and some were relaxing. This was none of those things, and maybe it didn't need to be. 

"I... I understand." Stahl said. He wrought his hands, sighing in defeat. It was as if all the fire in his soul had gone out, where only a flicker remained. 

"This- this isn't the end of us, Stahl. This is just, um, an intermission, okay? So please, smile for me. I don't want our last meeting to end like this..." Moisture pooled in her eyes, and she couldn't help but to giggle at the realisation. 

Raising a hand to wipe away her tears, Stahl blinked, vision blurred. It was getting hard to think now. There was a small part of him that was hoping it was all just a bad dream. "Don't say that. One day, you will return to us. To me. Celeste, I must be luckiest man alive for someone like you to come into my life. You were the best thing to ever happen to me. I couldn't bear to let you go, but if I must..." 

"Please don't forget me, Stahl. Even if I forgot the life I had before, you helped me become the person that I am today. I must thank you for that. You and the others."

"I love you, Celeste."

"I love you too, Stahl." 

"I don't want you to go."

Wrapping her arms tightly around him, Celeste buried her face into the crook of his neck. She inhaled deeply, trying to preserve the scent of his natural musk. Maybe it was for just a moment, but they were together, and that was all that mattered.

"I'll come back, I promise. In the meantime, well, I'll be here..."  she said, tracing the shape of a heart on his broad chest. 

_And in the stars, watching over you._

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> This is my Secret Stahl Santa for kkcaughtashootingstar! Featuring her MU was a bit of a task, but I hope I did Celeste justice! It's such a pretty name :)


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